Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Updates, Questions, Prayers

As recently mentioned here, Mark and I have been trying to work with our specialist at Mayo Clinic and our insurance company in order for me to receive a medication which has been shown to help women with my blood disorder to have healthy, lower risk pregnancies. Turns out more than 40% of pregnancies are lost when the mother has this disorder. (That staggers the mind when I look at Emma and Hazen. What a miraculous blessing they are!!) Having that information also makes us extremely cautious about going forward with another pregnancy without medical help.

We've been extremely optimistic about this treatment option as we've waited for this news since October. Every indication was that once the insurance company had the information available and the medical reasoning why it is necessary, we would be approved. 

Yesterday we received news from our insurance provider that they are denying our appeal for that medication. Stating that there isn't enough research to support its use. Note: there's not much research because its an uncommon disorder in young, otherwise healthy, women. Thus far we've only heard of Mayo Clinic ever doing any research on it.

We're just in shock right now. Once again, we had a plan in place that is now gone. We don't know which way to go, to push forward or go in a different direction. We don't know whether to close the door on more children or persevere for them. It seems that if we're having so much trouble, other families are too, and that gives us reason to push against the bureaucracy and try to make changes that might also help others. But right now we're just so tired. So confused. So disappointed.

We'd really love to have another baby. But we don't know if its going to be safe to try again without medical intervention. We're open to adoption but that is also a long, expensive, uncertain process. And if it's God's will, we want to release the desire for more children and pour our love into the two we've already miraculously been given (which, it should go without saying, we're going to do for them whether more children come along or not). There are many different roads before us but we don't know which way to go. So we feel stuck. Waiting. Wondering.

So please be praying for Mark and I as we seek the Lord's will. We want to keep our hands open for whatever He may have for us. We don't want to give up just because its hard, but we also want to be sensitive to the different ways God closes doors. We need direction.

In all this, we know that God is for us. We know He is up to more than we can see from our vantage point, that He is good and loving and worthy of all praise. We also know He desires us to know Him and follow as He leads, so please pray He would reveal Himself clearly, that we would be willing to follow and able to be changed by His Spirit. We are nothing but clay in the hands of our Potter. Let His will, be done.

7 comments:

  1. I've been praying for you all night and day - and I'll keep on praying for your family. <3

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  2. Love, prayers, hugs - all for you, Mark and the kiddos. Continually thinking of you today and always.

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  3. In your weakness, He is made strong. I pray in this time you will have His peace. Lord please make your way clear.

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  4. "In this world, you will have trouble. But take heart, I have overcome the world." My friend, I will pray this is not the end of the story but simply one more chapter in God's plans of growing your family, whatever that looks like from HIS eyes. Love you and your family, and will continue to intercede on your behalf.

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  5. The prayers are coming! I'm storming' heaven right now. Love you!

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  6. Mom says,

    We will continue to pray for you and Mark to have a clear answer from God on what to do next in planning to increase your family. God does want to give us the desires of our heart because he loves us so much. "If God is for us, who can be against us"?

    Lots of love to you both,
    mom Hintz

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  7. Dear Meg,
    Thank you for sharing this update and letting us know how to pray for you and Mark and your sweet children. I love you and think of you often.
    Bethany

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